Revelations of the Return
by Lotesse
Summary: Remus finds Sirius ill and exhausted on his doorstep the summer after the Triwizard Tournement, and learns of the horrific events of the last few months. A Sirius story, in both senses of the word.


Revelations of the Return

By Lótessë

" Sirius, I need you to set off at once. You are to alert Remus Lupin, Arabella Figg, Mundungus Fletcher-the old crowd. Lie low at Lupin's for a while; I will contact you there."

-Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

The quiet sounds of the rain flinging itself against his rather leaky roof, the wind attempting to tear off his only window, and the trees tossing wildly did not conceal the sound of a heavy, hollow, wooden boom. Remus Lupin slowly opened his eyes, reluctant to leave the warm oblivion of sleep that was his only escape from the monstrosity that he thought he was. His mind accused itself constantly: werewolf! He heard the noise again, and a single thought penetrated his sleep-soaked mind. Someone needed him. Someone was banging on his door. He rose and went to it, then stood stock-still, torn by indecision. He had a strange feeling that if he opened that door, something would change irrevocably, and his world would never be the same again. But then he heard a whimper. It sounded as if whoever was on the other side of the door was so exhausted and miserable that he just wanted to give up. His eyes widened, and he hurriedly wrenched to door open.

Sirius was standing on his doorstep, clinging desperately to the doorpost, as if his own legs were unable to support him. He was soaking wet, and water ran down from his limp hair into his heavily shadowed eyes and down his sunken cheeks. He hauled himself upright and reached a shaking hand out to his friend, whispering, "Remus" Then his eyes rolled back and he collapsed onto the wet stone, his body crumpling into a pitifully small heap. 

Remus knelt beside him, frantically trying to find some sign that Sirius still lived. He let out a huge sigh of relief when he felt a strong pulse in Sirius's wrist. His thoughts raced. *I've got to get him inside, out of this rain, before he gets seriously sick. If He isn't already.* He bent down and lifted his friend in his arms, shocked at how slight his weight was. *What's been happening to you, Padfoot? I thought you were safe in Hogsmeade, with Dumbledore looking out for you, and then you show up looking like this. Oh god, why did any of this have to happen to you, Sirius? You deserve so much better* 

Remus carried the limp body of the man who had gone through twelve years of horrible and undeserved torture into his living room, and laid him gently on the narrow bed. He looked his friend over carefully with a clinical eye. Sirius was pale as parchment, and beads of cold sweat stood out on his bony forehead. His forehead was burning up with fever, but Remus hoped that some sleep, a hot meal, and a long and much needed bath would bring his friend back to health. He sponged Sirius's brow with warm water as he settling into an easier sleep. Heaving a sigh of exhaustion and pity, Remus pulled a chair closer to the bed, sat down, and closed his eyes, He was asleep within moments.

***

Remus woke with a start, and saw Sirius thrashing about on the bed, obviously in the throes of a nightmare. Lupin shook him awake, murmuring his name repeatedly. Sirius gasped and sat bolt upright, panting, his eyes wide with fear and something that looked suspiciously like worry. "Harry! HarryR-Remus? What" , he broke off coughing. 

"Shh, shh, Padfoot, it's all okay. You're safe. It'll all be alright." 

Sirius grabbed Lupin's arm in desperation. "Is Harry safe? I dreamedoh god, Remus, II'm so afraid" Sirius was shaking. Remus reached out and pulled him into his arms, rubbing his back with a comforting hand, but Sirius pushed him away. Taking a deep breath, he said, "Remus. You need to listen to me, Remus. Dumbledore asked me to come." Moony's eyes widened, but Sirius continued talking, ignoring the other's surprise. "Something's happened, Moony. The worst. It's like some kind of bad dream. HeI don't know how to say this gently, Reem, so I'm just going to say it. I don't think I need to beat around the bush; not with you at least. Moony, Voldemort's back. He's been resurrected, and with all his power intact. The Death Eaters are gathering again. It's just like it was fourteen years ago."

Lupin just sat there stunned. *He's back. Oh God, he's back. * Memories like a red tide rose in his head: the Dark Mark, the vacant expression of his friend Frank Longbottom, and the dead bodies of James and Lily. His mind flashed back to Sirius calling out his godson's name in the claws of his nightmare, and gasped. "Harry? Padfoot, is Harry all right? He's notnot dead, is he? Padfoot" 

"No, he's alive, although I don't know about all right, not after what he's been through. He, he was _there_ , Moony. He watched the Dark Lord's rebirth. Voldemort killed another boy right in front of him. Harry, being Harry, blames himself. He's going mad with guilt over it, on top of everything else. He was almost killed as well. Voldemort tried all three of the Unforgivable Curses on him. I can only imagine what it must have been like for him I'll never forget how he looked when Dumbledore brought him up to his office. He was trembling like a leaf, Moony, and he looked so pale, I could tell that he was just barely conscious, and it was obvious that he was trying very hard not to cry. He's so like James, he has the same stubborn brand of courage. When I looked at his face, it looked as though something in him had just_ died,_ his innocence maybe. He looked as if he was three-quarters dead himself. I just don't understand. Why does this happen to him?"

"And what the hell happened to _you,_ Sirius? You're feverish, and you look so thin that I'm surprised I can't see right through you," said Remus, his brow wrinkling in concern and frustration. Sirius scowled as though he didn't want to think about it, but the look on his friend's face didn't leave him much choice. 

He sighed. "Dumbledore asked me to gather the Order of the Phoenix. I've seen Mudungus, Arthur, Viviane, and Arabella. I traced Dedalus Diggle to Muggle London. When I finally found him, he, ah, he went berserk. You know he's never been exactly an independent thinker, and he must have completely believed the story that Ithat I was the Secret Keeper. He hit me with a couple of hexes before I managed to stun him, and he was yelling at the top of his lungs the entire time. I'm afraid I rather lost my temper with him. As if it isn't enough to have Death Eaters running around willy-nilly, I have to hide from the Ministry. Aren't they supposed to be on our side? But anyway, after they heard Diggle's story they raised the hunt for me back up. The whole country was looking for me, or at least that's what I gathered from the paper. I laid low in a London slum for nearly a week and a half before the Ministry found me. I knew it was inevitable after I read a piece in the Daily Prophet about how Snape, the git, informed the Ministry that I am an Animagus. Well, they found me. And they hadthey had a dozen Dementors with them." Sirius shuddered, and Remus noted anxiously that his face had attained a new level of pallor. "I ran," Sirius resumed. "I ran and I've kept running ever since. I hope I'm not endangering you by being here, but I needed somewhere to stop before I got to sick to run anymore."

Remus reached over and touched his friend's thin hand gently. "Either way, I'm glad you're here," he said comfortingly. "I'd rather be in trouble with the Ministry than have you going back to Azkaban. God, Sirius, I spent twelve years believing that I had no friends. Do you honestly think that I could go back to living like that after getting you back? And having you is the best thing that's happened to me since Lily and James died. I'll not let you go back there, not without putting up a fight. Im not the only one depending on you, either. What would Harry do without you? You're the closest thing to a father he's ever known."

"Harry." Sirius whispered the name as if it were a prayer, "Harry. You know Remus you sound like him, worrying about me getting caught. Las summer he owled me saying that his scar was hurting him again. I started north, I knew he needed me. But then the blessed boy sent me another letter saying that he was fine and that he's just imagined the pain. He worried all year about me staying in Hogsmeade even though he had the Triwizard Tournament on his plate. On Remus, I don't deserve him; I never did anything to warrant having someone as wonderful as he is love me. I'm partly responsible for the fact that he's spent most of his life as an emotionally stunted orphan, and yet he still loves me. And I love him too. I love him so much, Remus; I'd face ten thousand years in Azkaban with a smile if it could give him the life he should have had. He deserves so much more. Why do all these things have to happen to him, Remus? I've never known a better, sweeter boy, and his life has been hell. Why, Remus? Why" Sirius found to his amazement that his voice was becoming thick with barely controlled sobs, and that tears were coursing down his sallow face. He gulped, "James and Lily, and now Harry oh Moony, if anything happened to him I don't know what I'd do." Remus once again wrapped his arms around him and this time Sirius let him hold him close and he sobbed into his friend's comforting shoulder. 

**

Several hundred miles away, a small, skinny boy with incorrigible dark hair sat before his open window. He was holding tight to a picture, taken years before. In it, a man who looked much like him stood with his arms around a woman whose long red hair cascaded around the shoulders of her white satin wedding dress. Beside then stood a man in plain black dress robes, his laughing eyes fixed on the boy lovingly. The boy sighed and looked out of his window. His eyes raked the night sky, searching. They fastened on the Dog Star, the brightest star in the sky, at the heart of Canis Major. With teary eyes, he whispered, "I love you, Sirius."


End file.
